RUMOURS FROM HEAVEN By Tom Jensen
The creator never really had a chance when his disciples could no longer walk straight
The power of song and dance unleashed after ages inside the Golden Gate
Now that there's rock n roll in heaven everyone enjoys the hymns
And the only problem the church has is getting everybody in
These guys all got the same room upstairs
Yes, their landlord is god still no one seems to care
They all sit and scratch their heads wondering just who'll come knocking next
Yet time has told them that it's anyone’s guess
Everybody's grateful to be dead because now they're the house band in Heaven
They fill the place every single night
Now that doesn't sound too upsetting
Hard to tell just how the conversation sounds
When John’s head is just about to hit the ground
Hey John, it's George whose been knocking at the door
Because of course Paul would've rang the bell
John responded that George must've left the Maharishi
Or else I figured we'd a seen him in hell
There goes Hendrix playing without his hands
Wearing only his headband and his funky underpants
Hey George, go get a bucket of cold water
Let’s see if we can get him outta this trance
Sammy Davis Jr. sure can tap dance and he don't eat much
But when Elvis Presley knocks don’t ever let him in
For he'll just eat all of the chips and dip -oh what a sin
But Sinatra's okay because he always brings gin
Hey who invited Bobby Dylan?
You know were not allowed to let anyone in early
Keith Richards came all the way up for nothing
But were sure we'll see him again shortly
The creator never really had a chance when his disciples could no longer walk straight
The power of song and dance unleashed after ages inside the Golden Gate
Now that there's rock n roll in heaven everyone enjoys the hymns
And the only problem the church has is getting everybody in
John whispers: No you ain't gonna see what I got in my pocket
But the words that come to me are knock it off and stop it
You say you want to change your ways but just what's the use?
I have had far beyond my years too much pain and abuse
Jim Morrison wakes up mumbling something odd:
The day revolves around the tears falling from the serpent’s eyes
I hold the pain of the world inside my mind
My ears can no longer hear a child cry
My senses crawl beneath my skin
As a man who once saw all becomes blind
But they all know George is not the type to be out done:
The pressure of the sky falls on your back
The clouds start laughing in your face
The weather changes all the time
So remove your soul from within its case
Old Blue Eyes never wants to join in
Unless there’s some ladies around
When it’s just the guys he’s called the Chairman of the Bored
Sitting in some darkened corner trying not to be found
Now it sounds pretty sad but everybody is still waiting for Billy Joel
But even though he’s bald and fat he's still not that old
They’d be happy with Elton John because they need someone on the keyboard
When everybody heard he stopped doing drugs they all cried out oh lord!
The group is still split about fifty – fifty between Madonna and Britney Spears
They'll take anyone but Barbara Streisand
Her stealing the show is what everybody fears
The creator never really had a chance when his disciples could no longer walk straight
The power of song and dance unleashed after ages inside the Golden Gate
Now that there's rock n roll in heaven everyone enjoys the hymns
And the only problem the church has is getting everybody in
So now you know what you can look forward to when your day finally comes
You can walk up the stairway to heaven and go chasing the band that's never on the run